Wish not granted

If the wish was the game would close causing many players to commit suicide

I wish I could beat ninja gaiden 2 on Warrior

Granted. You, however, in your lust to beat the game again, try it on Master Ninja difficulty. After failing at the first boss several, epic times, you decide to turn off your Xbox (which is broken by the way). Your soul is sucked into the Xbox, and no one ships it off to Microsoft to be fixed. Too bad. You, endless ninjas, and rapid fire rockets. You don't even survive level 1/2.

Epic. Fail.

I wish I had someone in the chatbox to kill... I lost mah wallet and I'm PISSED!

Granted. The person in the chatbox whom which you kill is not Dave, thankfully.

I wished that i r 73h l337z04xz!1eleven and r g0n t33ch u l3ss0n n haz j00r gf 4 d4 h0l3 n1gh7s

..umm...not granted. Because no one could read it.

I wish I had a dream.... a dream that occured 4 score and 7 years ago... a dream... where all those chinese sons of bitches had got to go...

...Granted. But apparently, there were no chinese children born from feminine dogs. So it won't make a difference, unless female dogs start giving birth to chinese people.


My mouse just broke. I'm working with Tab, my arrow keys and Enter. I wish for a new mouse. Which is the same. Which won't break, until about 5 years have passed. Which doesn't got ruined or sabotaged in anyway. Which I will take care of. Which I will not lose in anyway. And is wireless.

granted. but, said mouse explodes. so sorry. You survive, but the only way to get medical help is by going to a 911 emergency website. You, however, have no mouse, and the explosion destroyed your arrow keys and tab key. ouch. that blows. you end up dieing.

I wish I had a waffle.

Granted. You get a radioactive waffle which has mutated your sperm cells and make your balls hurt for eternity.

I wish you weren't going to ruin this wish.

Granted. But by NOT ruining your wish, I nullify the point of this retarded thread game, and baleete it straight to Purgatory. FAZAAAH!

I wish for a wish that wishes for a wish which in turn wishes for a wish that wishes for a wish that, in all actuality, is wishing for a wish that wishes.

Alright, you get your "wish". But in each wish wished by the wisher, something awful happens to you. Maybe burnt toast. Maybe getting mauled by a rogue hamster. Or maybe YOU do not get another wish. Maybe the wish wishes you unable to wish for more wishes, and the wishes you wished for are now freelance wishes off to wish for themselves.

I wish the site wasn't dead :'(

Granted but it eats you.

I wish that my laptop didn't crap out every couple of months.

...wha?
anyways...
Granted, but it doesn't crap out because IT EXPLODED, Pronz overload, the thing just cumshot into the user-interface and totally wrecked it all to hell.

I wish people would understand my desires when it comes to alien-robot-satellite-sex.